Text Offender (digigasm) wrote,
Text Offender
digigasm

I tried reading The Da Vinci Code. I couldn't do it.

I really thought I'd like it. You see, I'm so far detached from mainstream media that when hear a buzz it's usually a good thing.

My first gripe is all the French. I don't speak French. It's not that I have anything against French. It just annoys me that I don't know how to read it or pronounce it. I don't hold it against the author because it's my drawback. It's not anything that's going to stop me from reading if it's otherwise a good story.

My second gripe; the Bad Guys. The catholic church. The Vatican. Oooo, scary. Yawn.

And finally the thing that made me stop wanting to read 1/4 through the book. You know in Pulp Fiction where there's all this trouble about the shiny thing in the briefcase. You never get to see what's in the briefcase but you assume it's valuable. This book has something like that every other chapter. It works in Pulp Fiction because it's only one thing and knowing what's in the case isn't necessary to the plot. It's just enough to make you aware that it's an inside joke that you can appreciate for it's own sake. In The Da Vinci Code it's pesky because it's overused. A character sees something or knows something that causes them to change their course of action but the reader doesn't get to peek until later. It just seems like a cheap attempt at suspense. Over. And Over. And over.

Fuck it. I'll wait for the PG-13 movie starring Angelina Jolee and Tom Cruise (to make it to the discount rack).

Instead I'm going to begin reading violet_rain's New Favorite Book, Torture the Artist by Joey Goebel. After that...maybe some Neal Stephenson or Willy Gibson.
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