Text Offender (digigasm) wrote,
Text Offender

I love being me.

So much going on. So little time to document it.

I did my sleep study on October 20th. The original appointment was for the 27th but I asked to be notified in the event of a cancellation so that I might get it done earlier. It happened. I brought a box full of computer parts to assemble to keep my hands and mind busy while I waited to get tired. At 10pm the sleeptech started shaving my legs and gluing shit all over my body. By midnight I was laying in bed tethered to the wall by various tubes and wires. There were two cameras (one optical, one infrared) pointed at the bed and a microphone hanging over my head. There were roughly 30,000 wires bundled at the back of my head. I thought that a strange place to bundle the wires since it was intended that I sleep on my back like that but I played along.

The lights were turned off and I waited...

I can never fall asleep when I have to. And it wasn't any easier with what felt like section of rebar glued to the back of my head. It wasn't any easier knowing that if I changed position I risked snagging and disconnecting one of the electrodes. It wasn't any easier knowing that every throat clearing, fart, and scrotum scratch was being recorded. So, yeah, it took me a long time to fall asleep. 10 hours or so. They let me sleep for about an hour before waking me up and telling me I could go home.

I took a shower before I left. I had to wash and condition my hair three times. Water soluble glue, my ass.

2 days ago the doctor's assistant called to inform me that my test data had been analyzed and that I had been diagnosed with Severe Obstructive Sleep Apnea. I said, "Severe, huh? Does that mean the doctor's going to get me in right away?" She just laughed. Now I get to go do a second sleep study. This time they're going to hook me up with a face mask and wake me up every half hour to check the calibration. They still haven't called me to make an appointment.

When I haven't been trying to sleep and breathe at the same time I've been fixing computers at work. When I get burned out on that I get to fix computers at home. I've been drinking a lot of alcohol and trying not to think about guns.

Meanwhile, I always feel negligent. I don't call my relatives enough. I don't spend enough time with my wife and kids. If I had any friends I probably wouldn't be spending any time with them.

But on the bright side, Bush "won" and my 30th birthday is on Sunday.

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