February 9th, 2003

max

(no subject)

I just got back from the bar. At midnight I decided that I would go to the bar to have a drink at 1:00. I was going alone and my idea was that by going out so late, I'd have a lot of trouble getting silly. I was right. I walked in right at last call. I ordered a shot of rye and a Mac 'n' Jack's. They didn't have any rye. Bummer. I was kinda looking forward to trying rye. I ordered a shot of Maker's Mark bourbon instead. Guns 'n' Roses came on the jukebox.

I started thinking about the first time I'd heard of GnR. I first saw "Welcome to the Jungle" on MTV at my aunt's house. This detail is not significant. At the time, my mom was dating a guy she met at AA. I can't remember the guy's name but he was at least 10 years younger than my mom. This guy gave me a copy of Appetite for Destruction. He is also the person responsible for introducing me to The Rocky Horror Picture Show, A Clockwork Orange, and The Exploited.

Why am I telling you all of this? How the fuck should I know? I just thought it was cool that one person that I only knew briefly had the power to nudge me in a direction that I'm still more or less heading today.

Tits.
max

(no subject)

Are you desirable? Are you irresistable? Maybe if you drank bourbon with me it would help. Maybe if you kissed me and I could taste the sting in your mouth it would help. If you drank bourbon with me naked...If you smelled of bourbon as you fucked me, it would help. It would increase my esteem for you. If you poured the bourbon on you naked body and said, "drink this". If you spread your legs and you had bourbon dripping from your breasts and your pussy and said, "drink here". I could fall in love with you. Because, then, I would have a purpose; to clean you up. And that would prove that I'm worth something. I'd lick you clean so that you could go away and fuck someone else.